Dearest White Blood Cells,
Oh you pesky little buggers that keep me alive and free from nasty infections. I never really thought of you much and that was wrong of me. A terrible oversight that makes my heart ache and my mind tense from the thought of what life could be without you. Alas, at this time, I am running low on you guys and I realize the enormity of my misplaced affections.
I miss you so much that I shall stay indoors in the safety and comfort of my own home in the hopes that you will return to my body and protect me from the evils of this world. I promise that I will not enter another man’s cove and mistakenly touch his doorhandle. I assure you that I will keep my lair clear of friends and foe (especially Scott Foe) that may bring harm to my Heavenly temple.
I shall wait here patiently for you to return. I wish you safe voyage and a pledge a large celebration upon your arrival home to my body.
Yours lovingly and forever,